South of the border

Alright so after recovering from the so called baseball injury I was ready to fly down to the marvelous city of South Beach. It was me and two of my friends just high rolling down in MIA, you know got the nice little A8 pulling in the underground garage on

5400 Collins Ave (Millionaires’ Row). We rented a condo since it was more cost effective, this place was just unbelievable. The place was so big, it was cool just to sit back and chill at the condo and do some drinking and watching Entourage. The beach, the pool, and the Jacuzzi were in the backyard of this high rise so it was just luxury at your feet. The weather was typical Florida humidity, at times it was pleasant outside, but sometimes it was disgustingly humid, so blasting the air conditioner in the car was must while keeping the windows open to for a fresh scent of the Atlantic Ocean. Of course the ladies were looking really pretty 24-7.

The whole trip was just high energy and hustle filled with beaches, liquor, night clubs, music, restaurant, casino boats, shopping, fancy cars and feisty Latino ladies, and a serious lack of sleep. I mean the city can definitely come off a bit intimidating from standpoint that if you want to live the REAL South Beach life you better be on top of your game, whether your game is legal or illegal, it doesn’t matter as long as it brings in steady funding for the Cloud 9 lifestyle that you may choose to have. Since I was only down there for a week I suppose I was willing to put the lack of riches in my life to the side and just enjoy the atmosphere and be smart baller on a budget

I guess one thing that kind of bothered me more in relation to a culture shock, was that Spanish was pretty much the first language down there. I mean every where you go it’s just Latinos almost like you are in another country. It was interesting for me to try to remember some Spanish from high school and talk it up. I tired to tune out the Latino folks who pretty consumed the entire clerical and blue collar job market down there and concentrate on the finer things. It was nice to wake up and go to the ocean or look out the window and drool over multi million dollars homes covered with Spanish roofs, whose garages were docks housing lavish boats. The scenery of the city was magnificent. The real estate market is booming down there, there were ocean front high rises being built left and right.

Of course the huge night club scene down there resulted in ridiculous lines to some of these so called fancy clubs. For the really upscale places, if you are not famous you needed to tip the door bouncer to just put you on a consideration waitlist, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? Or you needed to bring some girls along to even get in, or you had to buy a fancy ass bottle of bubbly. Pulling girls to get in the club wasn’t a problem, we just had to work some street magic like David Blaine, be vocal and entertain ourselves with female company in line. A lot of them were straight up gold-diggers, asking me if I will be paying for their entry fee and buying them a drink or tow. Me being who I am, I just put on a circus by clowning them and sending them back to the end of the line. Some girls were more down to earth and just wanted to have good time and the feeling was mutual.

There was a lot of partying and crazy dancing, you might have caught some the pics that I posted online it was definitely intense. Honestly though, I don't know if I would move down there to live. Obviously the cost of living is a lot higher so I would have to find a comparable job. It was just a way too humid, temperatures that my body was just refusing to deal with. At times I got the feeling of alienation that I did not really belong there. As warm as it was down there were times when it felt cold on the inside. When I first partied in Chicago, it felt like I was right at home, but South Beach was different.

You need lots of cash and lots of pull to have a fancy life that is comparable to some of the rich locals. This is something that I already knew, but it was one of those things that you just need to go through in your life and say “ah yes I have been there and done that” and move on. Maybe one day I will be back there, who knows.